Honeymoon Day 1

Ξ October 8th, 2005 | → 0 Comments | ∇ Costa Rica, Humor, Maria Luisa, Rants, Travel, Whatever |

For some reason, I thought it would be a cool idea to leave really early the day after the wedding. You know… get to Mexico City early enough to actually DO something. Well it seemed like a good idea at the time…

The flight was Mexicana leaving San Jose at 7 AM. Our helpful travel agent to us the be at the airport three hours early. I know this is good advise for daytime travel, but at 4 AM, I can now tell you from experience, there ain’t a freakin’ soul at SJO.

Needless to say, we breezed right through. We made it to the gate with the idea of snoozing a bit. We were toast after the wedding, the party, and a bunch of people who stayed late to watch Costa Rica kick some serious US butt 3-0 in soccer. Head to head, I’ll cheer for my Yanks, but in this case, the USA was already going to the 2006 World Cup and this was the last chance for CR to get on the list. It was a popular win.

So 6:30 came and went with no announcements about the flight. Never a good sign. The a helpful Mexicana employee told us our plane was sick and needed an emergency visit to the plane doctor, but was expected to be well again by…. WHAT???? 4 PM?? Now THIS seriously sucked. This same cheery person then told us we would all receive a $6.00 voucher for breakfast. I laughed so hard I damn near fell off the seat. For those of you not familiar with SJO, you cannot buy a small diet soda at that airport for less than $3.00. Burger Kings START at $7.00 per. Now THAT is a whopper of a price.

So we decided to go eat breakfast ($27.00 less the helpful $12.00 in vouchers) and decide if we just wanted to go back home and wait. This was really a non decision as they would not let us leave the airport. This turned out to be a good thing though as a quick call to my helpful travel agent netted the info that the plane was already back from the plane doctor and would leave forthwith. Cool!

Or not…

This is my first experience with Mexicana, so I will not roast them… yet. I have three more flights though, and I am hoping these will go better. Now those who know me might describe be as …. um…. huge. I can easily block out the sun for small towns and villages. In fact, my ex wife once told me that one of my best features was the ability to provide warmth in the winter and shade in the summer…. but I digress.

The plane was like a meat locker. Large people normally LIKE meat lockers. This plane however, was just silly. You could see your breath! I asked the cheerful flight attendant (HAHAAHAAHAHAAHHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA) if I might have a blanket. I might as well have told her that I was visiting from Zebulon. Away she went with that cheery “blow it out your butt” attitude normally found only on US Airlines before the budget airlines taught us that air travel can be fun and flight attendants do not have to be rude bitches.

Needless to say, she disappeared. Flight Attendant TWO (hereafter FA2) stopped by. I again asked for a blanket as now did 4-5 others. She just gave the ol’ nurse Rachett (sp?) smile and left. FA3 and FA4 did likewise. Then comes along control lady from the service desk. I ask her if there are blankets on board. Now SHE is nice, and gives me a cheerful “SURE”, then leaves the plane forever. FA1 returns and completely ignores me. FA3 returns and ignores me AND the other 5 or so people who wanted blankets. We take off.

Now if it was cold on the ground… at 30,000 feet, it could easily have snowed over our seats.

People were getting testy as people DO when being ignored. Finally enters FA4… or maybe it was FA1… not sure as my eyeballs now have a layer of frost which impairs my vision. I again ask her for a blanket. She gives me the “eye roll” thing which I think all teenage girls learn early in life (mine did) and is the major cause of parents murdering teeneage girls everywhere on earth… but I get my blanky!!!

Now this would SEEM to make everyone happy… except now, the pilot has been notified of weather conditions aft (like it’s freakin frezzin!) and happily turns on the HEAT. The woman across the aisle is in heaven. She is a size ZERO with NO body fat and it is likely she has never experienced perspiration in her young life. ML and all the women on board hate her.

The blanket is now extraneous. I am thinking may be FAs 1-4 will now be more cheery. Wrong. The only people they are polite with are the other attendants.

We land in DF about 4 PM. My helpful travel agent has told us to look for the (free) ground transportation to the Nicco. Two problems: First, there is no ground transportaiton anywhere and TWO, free ground transport is not included anyway. “It is!” sez I, showing the people at the information desk the confirmation from my helpful travel agent. They just laugh and laugh and we pay $25 for a cab ride just to get to our hotel. Once here, the hotel people also laugh a bit, (though MUCH nicer laughing) and explain that all travel agents put that crap in the itinerary, but it is just horsepucky and we should ask for the refund when we return. I laugh now.

Now the Nicco is a most excellent hotel and I am thinking that the honeymoon is now in gear. Nice hotel, nice front desk lady who understands my Spanish and would bring me a blanket for SURE if I asked. She could NEVER work for Mexicana! Only complaint is that they charge $16.00 per 24 hour period for the Internet in-room. Should be free at $400 A NIGHT… but I’ll live.

The room is big with a spectacular view! I’ll take some pix to post here.

Maria and I are like veggies… so tired… we showered skipped dinner and hit the sack at 7:30 PM. It is 3 AM as I write this. Later, we are going to hire a driver and tour Mexico City. I am going back to bed. IT’S MY HONEYMOON.


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